September was the most September September ever. Back-to-school, birthdays, the Real Simple Home launch, even a family loss, it was a lot. That’s why October feels like a breath of fresh air. A chance to pause, reset, and finally finish “Iron Flame.”
Giveaway!!! We’re giving away a “In My Surthrival Era” hat to TWO readers! To enter, read and enjoy “Tidy Takeaways” and then leave a comment on this newsletter. That’s all - just a little reading and chiming in!
Every year I like to say that everything feels better in October, and in some ways that’s true. Back-to-school isn’t a day, it’s a whole season: six to eight weeks of shifting from summer to fall, building new routines, and returning to our adult selves. That alone is exhausting.
This September layered on even more. We closed out summer with a final two-week road trip to visit family. Once school started, Emily traveled to Indianapolis for her mom’s 65th birthday. Add in the launch of the Real Simple Home apartment, with special events and tours, plus the normal back-to-school transition, and it was… a lot.
And just as our family was looking towards a two-day break from school at the end of the month, my grandma, Noreen Moore, died at the age of 94. While her death wasn’t unexpected, I dreaded the call. She passed peacefully in her home of over 60 years.
Already running on fumes, I booked a flight to be with my family, and the timing of her death turned out to be an unexpected gift. I spent three days home in Kentucky with my family and together, we channeled our energy into a kind of “death cleaning” of her home. It was challenging, but also deeply meaningful.
There’s more I’ll share on this topic in the weeks ahead, because it’s something we’ll all face at some point. September may have kept marching on, but my family and I found a way to pause, tidy the mess left behind, and make a little sense of it together. For now, I want to pass along a few resources and books that helped me through, and might just help you when the time comes.
Try to Find the Funny
Over the summer, I read A Clean Mess by Tiffany Jenkins, where she shares her recovery from drug abuse, her experience living in a halfway house, and the unraveling of a long marriage. Now, what does this have to do with death? A lot, actually. With irony, honesty, and candor, she shows how finding the funny in the middle of life’s most difficult circumstances can be a way through the mess.
I recorded a “Tidy Tidbits” podcast episode with Tiffany a few weeks before my grandma’s death. In Kentucky, I felt the crushing weight of emotions, but I kept praying I’d be able to find the funny somewhere in it. And then, as I walked out of the airport and my dad pulled up his car, we realized we were wearing the exact same outfit. We laughed at each other. The funny had found us, and it kept finding us.
“Tidy Up Your Life”
As Jo Piazza says, “If you don’t plug your book, who do you think will?” So I guess right now I’m going to do that. My grandma had a copy of my book on her bookshelf, Tidy Up Your Life, right next to her beloved Shirley Temple doll. The four-step decluttering strategy from the book of “Clear, Sort, Assess, Plan” came in very handy as we walked into my grandma’s house to make sense of both her death and her life.
Before walking in to the house together, my family and I had made a plan, but we realized we needed to add one step before starting: Process. We had to sit with what had unfolded in her home, reflect on her final moments, and give ourselves permission to feel before we started clearing, sorting, assessing, and planning.
We also gave ourselves permission to “shop,” to choose items that sparked memories, feelings, or ways to honor her before moving forward with the decluttering steps. And then to sit and talk about them, using the items as a way to share stories or memories.
If you haven’t read Tidy Up Your Life yet, I hope you do. I’ve reread it myself many times, and it continues to speak to me in different ways through different seasons.
The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning
Years ago, I read The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. It’s a book I’ve often recommended to people walking through the process of sorting a loved one’s belongings. It’s also a reminder of something bigger, the beauty of everyday objects, the meaning they sometimes hold, and the quiet art of gradually letting things go.
We don’t bring anything into this world with us, and we can’t take anything with us when we go. That’s a fact. And yet, for so many of us, maybe even you, there are moments when the sheer weight of what we’ve accumulated feels crushing. There’s real beauty in pausing to consider how we might steward the possessions we have, or even begin to give them away, to others who could use them or appreciate them.
So many of the themes from that book came to life as we sorted through my grandma’s things, and they continue to echo as we carry her memory forward.
The Things We Keep (Yes, even I kept some things)
One year for my birthday, my mom gave me the book What We Keep, which explores the ordinary objects that hold extraordinary stories for the people who’ve held onto them. It’s a beautiful book that challenges the notion that monetary value is what gives an object meaning. We know that isn’t true, so many simple things can trigger deep memories.
When I learned my grandma had passed, one of the first things that came to mind was the light switch cover in her kitchen: a happy little pig in a chef’s hat, standing with a mixing bowl, its spoon cleverly positioned to turn the light on and off. I must have passed by that switch countless times, usually on my way out the door, where I would pause as she stopped to give me a hug and say “I love you” before I left her house.
That light switch cover now hangs in my own kitchen. It’s one of the many small, ordinary objects I chose to keep, because of the extraordinary memories it holds.
This season is teaching me that there’s beauty in life, and in the messy mix of feelings it brings. Here’s to giving yourself permission to feel what you need to feel, without the pressure to tidy it all up right away.
The Latest - Tidy Tidbits
Life can feel overwhelming, and there’s never enough time to do it all. That’s why I started Tidy Tidbits, a micro podcast with practical tips and real stories in five minutes or less.
From simple routines, to navigating the protein era, to a peek inside a small-space home, and a conversation with one of my favorite authors, each episode is designed to give you something useful (and doable) in the time it takes to make a cup of coffee.
Here are the latest episodes that dropped in September!
Links Worth a Click
The 2025 REAL SIMPLE Home was such a fun project! I worked with a team of six interior designers, a celebrity designer (Drew Barrymore!) and I was the featured organizer, to transform a four-bedroom penthouse into a dream New York City home. The October issue of the magazine is full of details and photos of each room.
The REAL SIMPLE website also has lots of fun features of the space. Here are a few articles that showcase the spaces I had the honor of organizing inside the apartment:
Our 2025 REAL SIMPLE Home Is Here—and It’s Bigger (and Better) Than Ever: Take a virtual tour of the space, in a freshly built Lower Manhattan high-rise!
6 Life-Changing Organizing Ideas We’re Stealing From the REAL SIMPLE Home: I organized the refrigerator, pantry, and laundry room, and this article outlines some of the best strategies that you can implement in your own home from each space.
The Smart IKEA-Inspired Storage Idea That Made This Small Laundry Room Feel Twice as Big: I maximized the space in the laundry room with a floor-to-ceiling shelving unit, rolling cart, wall-mounted hooks, and more. Get all the details!
6 Smart Organizing Tips for the Most Clutter-Prone Areas of Your Home: Check out the creative organizational ideas that I added to common clutter hotspots!
3 Things to Declutter this Month
October has a way of shifting us fully into cozy season. Sweaters, warm drinks, and and before long, Mariah Carey on repeat. Time to make space now for the new season.
These 10-minute decluttering tasks are inspired by my decluttering calendar, straight from my book Tidy Up Your Life. You don’t need a full home overhaul to feel the difference, just a timer, a category, and a little momentum.
NOW is also the perfect time to sort through your kids’ dress-up clothing (or your own) while people are staring to be on the hunt for Halloween costumes. (I’m still deciding if my “Tidy Dad” superhero costume will make its debut again 👀).
Want to make your own? Download a blank Decluttering Calendar PDF HERE.
1. Winter Clothing
It’s almost time to bring out the layers. Make sure you’re only storing pieces that fit and actually get worn.
🕒 10-Minute Tasks:
Coat + Jacket Check: Pull out heavy coats. Donate what didn’t get worn last year or no longer fits.
Accessory Sort: Line up hats, gloves, and scarves. Toss singles, pairs with holes, or extras.
Sweater Shelf Reset: Pick one drawer or shelf. Fold neatly, donate anything itchy or unworn.
2. Winter Gear
These bulky items eat up space. Clear out what’s broken, outgrown, or duplicated before the first snow arrives.
🕒 10-Minute Tasks:
Boot Lineup: Pull out all winter boots. Toss worn soles, donate outgrown pairs.
Snow Tool Sweep: Check shovels, scrapers, and salt. Keep one of each that works, let go of extras.
Sled + Sport Sort: Gather sleds, skates, and gear. Donate what kids have outgrown or never use.
3. Holiday Decor
Before the bins explode this season, make space for only what brings joy (and still works!).
🕒 10-Minute Tasks:
Light Test: Plug in string lights. Toss broken strands or ones you never bother fixing.
Ornament Edit: Sort through one box. Keep favorites, donate duplicates, toss cracked pieces.
Wrap Station Reset: Check wrapping paper, bags, tape. Recycle scraps, flatten and store what you’ll use.
Maintenance Department
Happy Quarter 4 (October–December)! Whether you live in an apartment, a house, or a castle, it’s time to get your space ready for the upcoming season! These maintenance tasks are a great place to start. Bonus: they spell out Tidy Dad! 🤣
Tidy up seasonal weather gear (gloves, scarves, hats, coats, boots etc.)
Inspect roof before winter, check for missing shingles or weak spots, clean the gutters
Dust your heating units, radiators, baseboard, and clean filters to improve heating efficiency
Yearly outdoor water check, disconnect hoses, insulate outdoor faucets
Deep clean your oven and stove to remove grease and any food residue
Assess home for winter, seal windows and doors, inspect insulation
Declutter storage areas, make space for holiday gifts and seasonal decor
Tidy Dad’s Reading Stack
Iron Flame by Rebecca Yarros - Yes, I’m still reading this book. It’s amazing, but it’s also over 600 pages! This one is wild, fantastical, and exactly what I need right now, I just need to get it finished. And then decide when to start reading Onyx Storm.
Feeding Littles Lunches by Megan McNamee - I’ve been the “snackle box dad” for months, and this book has helped me take that routine to the next level. She shows how to balance protein, carbs, and variety, while also making food fun. It’s beautifully designed and practical enough that kids can flip through and choose their own lunch or snack ideas. A reminder that mealtime can be both nourishing and collaborative.
No New Things by Ashlee Piper - I’m recording a “Tidy Tidbits” episode with Ashlee Piper soon to talk about her book, and the timing couldn’t be better. After sorting through my grandma’s things, I’ve felt more determined than ever to limit what comes into our home. Ashlee offers a fresh lens on conscious consumption and clutter, showing that sometimes the most sustainable choice is simply not adding more.
Mistletoe and Magic by Helene Sula - For many, it’s never too early to dream of the holidays. Helene Sula, beloved for bringing the magic of European holiday markets to her Instagram audience and blog, now has her debut novel arriving at the end of the month. I’ve already pre-ordered my copy and can’t wait to step into the season with her story. A reminder that joy, tradition, and celebration can begin right on the page.
Wondering what else I’m reading this year? Here’s the full list!
🎉 BONUS! If your book club reads Tidy Up Your Life this year, I’ll join your meeting for a virtual book club chat. Just send me an email or DM @tidydad and we’ll work out details and timing. Open to the first 10 book clubs who reach out, so grab your spot!
October Joy Plotting
In Tidy Up Your Life, I share the practice of joy plotting, taking a few minutes to anticipate moments of joy in the days ahead. Here’s my October list. Funny enough, every single one of these involves travel.
Emily’s heading to Chicago for some time away with her sister. The girls have already placed their orders, deep dish pizza and Chicago-style cheddar/caramel popcorn. I just hope she enjoys some much-needed time to herself. We’ve been trying to trade off more often, and I have a fun trip planned for November!
At the end of the month, all five of us are traveling together to Kentucky for my grandma’s memorial service. My entire extended family will be there, and it will be a meaningful time to celebrate her life together. We’ll fly out Friday evening and return on a 6 am flight Monday morning, just in time for school.
We’re also planning to squeeze in a fall family weekend getaway at our cottage. Autumn always arrives early in Pennsylvania, and we’ll likely come home with apples, pumpkins, and whatever other seasonal treasures we can gather.
Thanks for reading!
🧺 If you enjoyed this free newsletter and want MORE, check out my book Tidy Up Your Life, and consider becoming a paid subscriber to “The Tidy Times” on Substack! It gives you access to all the “Behind the Stories” and the full “Tidy Toolkit”. It’s $5/month or $50/year and helps keep the tidying (and storytelling) going.
Not annual yet? Now’s the perfect time to upgrade your plan!
And don’t forget about this month’s giveaway!!! We’re giving a “In My Surthrival Era” hat to TWO readers! To enter, read and enjoy “Tidy Takeaways” and then leave a comment on this newsletter! That’s all - just a little reading and chiming in. Thanks!
Sorry for your loss but so glad I found your Substack. I’m processing while writing about the journey of decluttering my parents” house and you have given great tips and reading material I need! 🙏 thank you!
Lots of excellent comments in this edition. I especially enjoyed your comments on Grandma’s death and the way the family rallied together in her memory. I donated some of my things to Good Will to have room for Grandma’s special treasures. I still have a few items to place where I can use and recall happy memories of her. Years ago, she introduced me to flow-blue dishes. I’m using one of those dishes of hers to enjoy my nightly popcorn. It’s just the right size for a serving. If I can figure out how to attach a picture of it on here, I’ll send it.